I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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