fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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