i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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