I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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