Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
