wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
