woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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