is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize