why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
