i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize
