i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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