was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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