girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
