She's JV to your varsity
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
