physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
we're so committed to being not committed
I was not drunk enough for that final.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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