why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
