He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
That accounts for only three of the penises
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
