porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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