Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
