:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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