Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
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