You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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