Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Randomize