i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
