it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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