I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
