I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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