Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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