Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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