Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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