THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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