Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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