thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize