No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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