I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
