I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
