your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
