We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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