Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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