I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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