I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
