He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
