how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
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You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
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Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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