I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
only you would photoshop your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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