i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize