So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
It was confusing and full of hummus
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
