Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
