you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
