Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
