Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My ass is underappreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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